- A shotgun shell
- Eight beer cans
- One pair of mismatched socks
I recognized the mismatched socks as my daughter's. Easy enough. Back home and into the wash they would go! She and our Great Pyrenees waded in the creek the day prior, so that explained that one, but I knew the shotgun shell and beer cans were not hers. That's the kind of thing camo wearing people would leave on the road. She would not wear camo. I'm pretty sure she's allergic to it, actually. She's thirteen and she does have a pink Daisy BB gun. She's not afraid to use it either! Probably not on a moving, living, breathing target, but I digress. Just because she may carry a gun occasionally to shoot ominous looking tree branches, she still would not wear camo. No, no, no! She would not don camouflage clothing even if you held a gun to her head. Mmmm, unless perhaps it was Hollister. Or the gun was Hollister and there was a matching camo bag or something.
The question remained, whose shotgun shells and beer cans were they? I suspect a Bubba. Bubbas wear camouflage clothing frequently. Furthermore, recycling isn't likely to be foremost in a Bubba's thought process. Additionally, a Bubba's preferred form of entertainment may include daily doses of shotgun shells and beer cans, tossed out of truck windows, and possibly with loud whooping and hollering robustly included. Bubbas may even transport these items around on their four-wheeler with an entourage of buddies following closely behind. The culprit might even be a local small-town policeman (off duty, of course) and appropriately named what else, but “Bubba”. Yep, I'm pretty sure that's who did it. I blame the Bubbas.